Cheaters are often narcissistic, manipulative and controlling – often with the ability to cover up these qualities by keeping their partner confused. The meaning behind their “lock & key” love necklaces may mean nothing to them but a tactic to keep their partner confused or happy.
What are “guilt gifts”?
Guilt gifts often are items gifted to their partner out of the blue which may have sentimental meaning to the receiver. These items could be watches, bracelets, necklaces, gift cards and cash. They are often given by narcissists and cheaters because they feel guilty about something they have done or what they are doing.
Why cheaters give “guilt gifts” to their partner
Simple, they feel guilty about what they have done and they do it to make themselves feel better. In some cases they give gifts to the person they are cheating on because they think it will keep them happy and reduce their suspicion of their partner’s activities. For example, you express to your partner that you feel lonely but they are emotionally involved with another. They may not have the desire or time to give you the attention you deserve so instead they spend some money on a gift which ultimately is the easiest way in their mind to make you happy.
Giving these gifts is a significant aspect in a cheater’s manipulation technique. Doing so can cover up infidelity for years while keeping their partner feeling happy and clueless.
How to tell if you have been given a guilt gift
One great way to find out whether you are being manipulated is to ask a friend to examine the situation from the outside looking in. Often times the manipulated don’t know they are being manipulated and may be so far in denial making it impossible to think rationally. Sadly, this is one effect of an emotionally abusive relationship and cheaters know it!
Explain your situation in detail to your friend and ask them to take notes which will make it easier to piece things together.
Make note each time you receive(d) a gift with the following details:
- Were you acting happy, sad or angry around your partner prior to the gift?
- Did the gift make you feel happy when you received it?
- How long did you feel happy after they gave you the gift?
- Were you confused by the gesture?
- How did your partner act prior to giving it to you and the days after?
You may soon notice several patterns in yourself and your partner after taking notes.
Ultimately, every situation is different and should be thoroughly investigated before jumping to extreme conclusions. A professional private investigator may be beneficial to you if your intuition is telling you something is off. Catching a cheater is not always easy. BEE-SAFE private investigators have a passion for helping victims of emotional abuse and infidelity. Contact Bee Safe Security today and see how we can help you.